Tips for Navigating Change and Transitions

Navigating through the ebb and flow of life's transitions can evoke a range of different emotional responses. In these moments of uncertainty, it's helpful to have a compass of self-reflection and introspection guiding our way. How do we navigate seasons of change? What tools do we have at our disposal to weather the storms of transitions? By asking ourselves these reflective questions, we can gain insight into our coping mechanisms and resilience in the face of uncertainty and learn how to adapt to the shifting tides of life.

Unlock the Power of Wise Mind for Balanced Thinking 💭

Navigating through intense emotions and inflexible thinking patterns is a journey that unfolds with patience and practice. Enter Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), a highly effective therapeutic modality developed by Psychologist Marsha Linehan. DBT has become a widely recognized and evidence-based therapy approach for teens and adults working on developing emotional regulation and fostering healthy coping mechanisms. With DBT, we learn to embrace our "wise mind," a space where feelings and facts harmonize and where acceptance meets the drive for change.

Instead of getting caught up in black-and-white thoughts like, "I can't do this," DBT encourages us to embrace the shades of gray and instead try thinking, "Yes, this is challenging, AND I'm capable of giving it my all." By embracing this balanced perspective, we become better equipped to weather the storms of intense emotions and break free from rigid thought patterns.

How To Cultivate Calm Within Your Nervous System

For many of us, the transition from one year to another may activate feelings of anxiety, stress, sadness and grief. When we notice these emotions arise in our body, it can be helpful to turn to grounding strategies to support our nervous system with regulation and balance. Below are a few supportive ways to connect to the present moment and help cultivate a sense of calm: 

• Go for a mindful walk, allowing your senses to tap into the environment around you. Pay close attention to the sensations of your feet on the ground with each step you take.

• Connect with your breath in your body through breathwork. Inhale through your nose and exhale slowly through your mouth, letting out a sigh with each exhale.  

• Tap into your senses with the 5-4-3-2-1 technique. Start by noticing and noting 5 things you see, 4 things you hear, 3 things you touch, 2 things you smell and 1 thing you taste. 

• Explore a body scan practice by slowly bringing awareness to the sensations you notice in your body.

• Change the temperature. Cold water activates your parasympathetic nervous system, helping you calm quickly. Splash your face with cold water or wash your hands under cold water.

Help Teens Use Curiosity To Navigate Difficult Feelings

Curiosity is a supportive tool for teens (and adults!) in navigating difficult feelings like anger, frustration, anxiety, and sadness. Getting curious about our emotional experiences as opposed to avoiding our feelings, judging them or pushing them away helps us develop tolerance for difficult emotional experiences. 

As adults, we can support children in using their inherent sense of curiosity as a means of developing self-awareness and learning how to approach their feelings with acceptance and compassion as opposed to judgement or resistance. Staying in a place of curiosity when difficult feelings arise also helps us avoid over-identification, or believing that feelings are permanent, truth-telling states that have more control than they really do. In reality, feelings are transitory and will always come and go. 

When explaining the benefit of curiosity when dealing with tough feelings to teens, I’ll encourage them to become “emotion explorers”. What can we learn from our feelings and our response to them when they arise? 

When you find yourself stuck in a feeling, try asking yourself the following questions:

• What specific emotions are coming up right now?

• What thoughts am I experiencing?

• Are any painful beliefs at play?

• How is my body responding? Where in my body do I feel these emotions?

• What do I notice about my facial expression or body posture? 

• What is the most painful or vulnerable part of this experience? 

You can support your teen in exploring these questions by inviting them to describe a feeling through art-making, or tell a story about a specific feeling that they are struggling with using great detail (i.e. “if that feeling had a voice, what would it say and what would it sound like?”) 

Pema Chodrin says, “Let your curiosity be greater than your fear.” By leaning into curiosity, we allow there to be space for meaningful reflection, learning and growth.